It’s almost time to get out of here. SOOOOO CLOSE!
But it’s also SOOOOOO FAR!
I can’t seem to tolerate the fact that there is still a semester of school left, so how will I survive? The answer is that I won’t, at least my brain won’t because it will be overdosed on human emotions that slowly drive my mind to screaming and myself to silence.
If I had normal people in my life, it would be fine. But that isn’t the case. There are some people that won’t stop complaining and people that go behind your back. There are people that are too controlling but I don’t have the power to tell them all to stop doing these things to me.
My confession today is that I want to leave. I want to leave and only come back for the holidays for the rest of my life. Maybe visit my mom and siblings for a week or two out of the year. That is all. I can’t handle any more that that.
My best friend is starting to not be my best friend anymore, another classmate is gloating and complaining until the sun sets, and my parents are confining me in a very small box that I keep wanting to claw out of but don’t have the strength to actually do it.
All my life I have been preserving myself by staying quiet, and it’s not working anymore. I need to burst from the box, tell my mind to shut up, and finally tell everyone how I feel.
Well, I know I need to do that, but will I? Probably not. Maybe when I finally leave. Maybe when I leave, I’ll get the courage to stand up for myself.
As of right now, my only confession is that I want to leave, but hopefully I find the strength to endure this and my confession will change to wanting to stay.
Confessions of a High School Senior 